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Monday 4 February 2013

IDIC 15

I received a answer finally after nearly a year of tests on my poor baby.
In a way I wish it was wrong, I wish we were still searching; I want to kick and scream that they are wrong, that my baby just has something little that can be fixed with some simple something anything even a magic wand.  I want it to be something else, something I can handle easily that won't change the rest of our lives
but it's not...
instead we will face
IDIC 15
 
(this will take you to a pdf of the disorder that takes a moment to load)
I cried on the way home
I can't fix it
and I will never be able to.
My baby is 1 in 30 000
my baby will not be like other children
I know at this point I do not know the severity of it all
I just know what i have read.
to be honest it scares me; making me want to throw the computer because it's wrong it can't be right.
but it is what it is.
♥I LOVE MY LITTLE PRINCESS♥
she is perfect.
I honestly don't care if she is different
what bothers me is I won't be able to always protect her from others.
I have worked with people with learning disabilities
and witnessed first hand how they can be treated
I have seen people shun them
I have heard the crude and hurtful comments
I have even snapped at those whose mocking cruelty has left small daggers in those mocked.
The world does not understand...
and I weep knowing that my loving, smiling, inquisitive, music loving, easy going baby will eventually ask me
WHY?
 
I know it's not going to be easy and there are MANY things I will have to learn;
Many people I will need help from;
and Many more appointments to attend (I hate Dr's offices, so do my kids. I'm going to have to put together some activity bags; honestly I don't know why I havn't already... wait yes I do time lol).
 
Already I am thankful  for the kindness and support of others
even from those who have gone through this; who's children are fighting the same battle. I am grateful for the support and knowledge that I am not alone there are others who understand.
Thank you everyone.